“…Vengeance is mine, I will repay, saith the Lord…”

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To the ugly, buck-toothed, cockeyed, worthless, good-for-nothing, lying, cheating, backstabbing, inbred-looking, step-sibling-fucking, chicken fucking, dirt bag, hood rat, penniless, trash can whore, sicko, piece of shit who took my son away from me…

To her miserable, lying, worthless, brat, bastard kid, who facilitated such a thing because she couldn’t deal with me raising my son the way I wanted to see him raised, with everything he ever wanted, and her jealousy pushed her over the edge…

And to the lying, gutless, son of a bitch who was too scared to show up to court in January to look me in the eyes like a man, who testified on the phone and lied to a Family Court judge and pushed all of this forward, manipulating everything to force an outcome, but couldn’t finish what you started…

Angela Sheets and Megan Sheets…  You two are the scum of the earth, the lowest of the low.  But know one thing, God’s wrath awaits you.  I wasted seven years and thousands and thousands of dollars on people that weren’t worth the fuzz I pull out of my pockets every day.  I’ll waste no more time even thinking about the likes of you because it makes my brain feel soiled and it turns my stomach.  I wish nothing but bad luck and misery on you because people like you deserve it, and I use the term “people” very loosely.  You aren’t even human.  You are subhuman filth.

Mark Horvath, if there was an ounce of man in you, you would have shown up in court and looked me in the eyes and said whatever you felt you needed to say.  Well, there is no man in you.  You’re not a man.  And if you think you ARE a man, then I would like to challenge you to a fight.  One on one, any parking lot in the tri-county area.  But you don’t have the stomach or the balls for it, do you?  You gutless son of a bitch.

In closing, let me say there is a special place in hell for you sorry excuses for humanity, and I promise you, as God is my witness, one day my son will know the truth about you rat fuckers and he will enjoy the legacy he deserves as my son.  He’ll eventually get away from the Sheets/Goldstrom/Radabaugh stench that permeates through this God-forsaken county, and he’ll still have a life worthy of what his upbringing should have been.

Just remember one thing, you God damn pieces of garbage:

“Vengeance is mine, I will repay, saith the Lord.”  Romans 12:19

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I Have So Much To Be Thankful For

thankful-thursday
Being thankful is a powerful emotion.  And an underutilized one, as well.

Like most people, I tend to only take stock of my life and realize what I’m thankful for after something significant has happened.  And that is the wrong strategy to take in life.

In my own case, I seem to only realize that I have a lot to be thankful for when I feel like my life is being destroyed.  Maybe that’s the eternal optimist inside of me realizing that things aren’t always as bad as they seem.  Or maybe its the Lord bringing it out in me.

In late 2012 and into early 2013 I was able to start looking at all the aspects of my life that were positives.  I had the support of great friends and I felt like I had a great future ahead of me.  I was planning a move to Illinois and had already taken some steps to get that move into motion.  I had a phone interview for a very good job and had already bought my airline tickets to fly out a couple of weeks later for an in-person meeting.  I figured while I was out there, I could start looking for living quarters and start putting down roots.  I was so excited for a new beginning because I was in complete control.

Or so I thought.  Instead of taking that opportunity and running with it, I made a mistake of ultimate dimension.  That mistake cost me my move and cost me a lot of my friends.  It cost me my dignity and my self-respect.  And a lot of wasted time and money.

But fate was able to extricate me from that mistake, in the most unpleasant and painful way possible, but it was worth it in the end to be able to be able to escape such misery.

And now, I can stop, and take a look around me and realize that I am, in fact, the luckiest man on the face of the earth.  And now, I have the chance to make the most of my life.

First, I am thankful for my relationship with my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.  I had an amazing experience with the Holy Spirit in 2013, and I wish I had held onto that a lot more than I did in the years that followed, but when you’re involved with people who are evil, it makes it difficult regardless of how strong your faith is.  I can say, now without question, my faith is unbreakable.  I will carry it with me for the rest of my earthly life.

Second, I am thankful for my family and my friends.  I don’t deserve the friends that I have.  They are the greatest anyone could ever hope for.  I have turned my back on them, denied them, ignored them and eliminated them from my life, though against my own will, I still allowed it to happen.  And while I was disconnected from them, I leaned on my family.  My mom and dad are both elderly but they are always there for me when I need them.  As for my friends, nearly all of them have returned to me and for that I will be forever grateful.  They will never again suffer the indignities they suffered before.

Third, I am thankful for my freedom.  It’s amazing how people can change you, and not in good ways.  For instance, if you are in a relationship or marriage, your significant other should want you to be the best person you can be and remain true to yourself.  I am thankful that I am free to be me.  I can do what I want, when I want, where I want and how I want without any interference from anyone.  I’m not in a situation where I am expected to make anyone else happy, and I am especially happy to be away from people who only wanted what they could get out of me.  Being single is a truly blessed feeling.

Fourth, I am thankful for all that I have.  My material possessions.  Money in the bank.  A nice home.  A dependable vehicle.  They may not matter in the grand scheme of things, but I am very happy to have them.  They are things that make me happy and that I enjoy.

Finally, I am happy just to be alive.  For 25 years I told everyone I would never see 40.  I don’t know why I felt that way, it was just an overwhelming feeling I had.  Kind of like a premonition.  In many ways, it may have held me back, because I never wanted to really commit to anything because I didn’t figure I would be around to see anything through.  I realize now that was the wrong attitude to take and hopefully I realize now that I have another 40 or 50 years to accomplish everything I have ever wanted to accomplish.

This March I’ll be taking in Spring Training baseball in Arizona for the first time, in person.  That’s a dream I have had for years that until now, had no chance of being realized.  And if my month-long experience is a good one, I am planning to make a full-time move to the desert southwest.  There I can make a real fresh start, from the ground up.  And that opportunity comes along very rarely in life, and I will take advantage of it.

I have so much to be thankful for.  And I am most thankful for the second chance I have been given to do things the right way.  I am not shackled by my mistakes any longer, I am not tied to empty words or stupid promises.  I am free and I have everything I could want in my life.  And to anyone who feels like they are at rock bottom and they have nothing to be thankful for, just think about this.  Instead of focusing on the things that are making you miserable, step back and think about all the blessings you have in your life.  I know that can be a significant challenge, but if you can do it, believe me, its worth doing it.

Life is not bad, life is good.  But you have to eliminate the negativity, whether it be people or possessions or addictions or whatever is causing you strife.  Sometimes those things are removed independently of any action, and I was lucky in that respect.  I was saved from my miseries without really having to fight them.  But if you do have to fight them, fight with all that you have.  Don’t back down.  Don’t go back into the same patterns and deal with the same people.  Life is worth living and it is worth protecting.  At all costs.

In closing, let me say that if you just ask God to help you, you can absolutely depend on the fact that He will.  It may not happen overnight.  But I can say, without hesitation, that God has delivered me from every bad situation I have ever found myself in, and if you just trust in His plan and realize that everything will work out in the end, the road you are traveling will be a lot less difficult.  Be thankful for what you have and give all that you can to make sure you utilize the power of being thankful every day, not just when you are at rock bottom.  Be thankful for your blessings every day of your life.

Peace.

Psalm 23

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An 1880 rendering of the 23rd Psalm

The Lord is my Shepherd; I shall not want.
He maketh me to lie down in green pastures:
He leadeth me beside the still waters.
He restoreth my soul:
He leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for His name’ sake.

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: For thou art with me;
Thy rod and thy staff, they comfort me.
Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies;
Thou annointest my head with oil; My cup runneth over.

 Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the House of the Lord forever.